It’s 10:30pm. I was hoping to be curled up with a book hours ago but this, that and the other thing kept getting in the way. And then there were the dishes that hadn’t been done yet. I started to get frustrated with Mark as I began cleaning up. I was secretly hoping he would take care of it.
I was being totally irrational however because 1) You should never secretly wish for your spouse to do anything. They can’t, nor should they ever be expected to, read your mind. And… 2) Unless your marriage is wildly out of balance, causing tension over who is or who’s not doing the dishes is a complete waste of energy.
Mark contributes to our marriage in more ways than I can count. There are so many things I don’t ever have to worry about because he’s got it. I hate to admit that sometimes I lose sight of what a gift that is.
I snapped myself out of my funk the moment I stopped dwelling on what he doesn’t do and started thinking about all that he does do. The list is long. By the time I was done with the dishes, my frustration had vanished. A healthy marriage has more to do with balance than everything being equal. And things are even going to get out of balance from time to time. A partnership is give and take. I believe when it’s led with respect and a mutual desire to support and elevate one another is when it’s bound to thrive.